Becoming less religious

Hey friends, loved ones and readers! I am back again with some thoughts and heart. For you who intimately know me, you would know that this has been an intense year for me. I started off this year balling my eyes out on my friend's couch because I was such a hot mess. I fell for a friend of mine, I was recovering from family trauma and as a family, we had also changed communities in a drastic way. But this was only the beginning. Soon to follow were events that would change my life forever.

I had possibly gone to the deepest pit and very quickly I must add. This time, the pit was different. I embraced the pit. I analyzed the pit. I sat in the darkness and asked the questions that would challenge my paradigm. Belief systems, values, morals, sexuality and truth were all and are still being challenged.

This journey can be daunting and one can lose oneself in all of the questions. We can formulate our own truths and believe that which we have come to a conclusion about. But these would be our own hypothesis. But what happens when we measure our conclusions to Jesus' truth? What does He say about our brokenness and our shortcomings then? The answer would be GRACE.

As I journeyed on and on, through tears and laughter. Through the changing of circles between church people and people who don't know Jesus. I started realizing how religious I have been all these years and how I have made this separation between "them and us". But the more I journey on in grace, the more I am becoming less religious. The more I understand that Jesus is in every moment of my life. In the high moments and in the moments I really, really mess up. He wants to be part of it and not apart from it.

I am reminded about how Jesus defended the lady amongst the religious. These were the teachers of the law. The ones who openly lived accordingly. And here they bring a woman amongst them who have been caught in the very act of defilement. Here they bring to the One who is pure and holy, someone that of a harlot. But Jesus calls to everyone who stands ready to stone her, to cast the first stone if they do not have sin. The very One who could cast the stone against her refuses to cast the stone but to stand to defend her. Why would the Son of God defend an unholy person? Surely, she deserved judgment, and so do we because we are 'her'. We are those of harlotry, and maybe not on the outside but deep in our hearts.

If we take a look at the generation we live in today, we clearly see that we do not need another "live by the rules" list; we need an encounter. We need to look Love straight in His eyes and so deep that we see our flawless reflection in Him. This will stir up our hearts to live purely for Him and not for a system or for rules. If we live for rules and we fail, which we always do because we are human, we have shame and guilt overcome us. Instead, if we lived in relationship and intimacy, He will share with us what hurts His heart and what brings Him great joy, and from that place, we grow in grace. We need to see what His eyes burn for! That is for us.

I have learned so much by loving all people from different backgrounds and cultures. I am in fact, humbled by these experiences. Every story and every life carries such richness, stemming from deep sorrows and unexplainable joys.

Amanda Cook, one of my role models, said this beautiful statement that blew my mind. She said we carry every age we have ever been. Just think about that for a moment. I am 26 years old and I literally carry every age I have ever been. We carry this in our souls. In that retrospect, as profound as that statement is, it is sad to see someone with a belief system outcasts another individual simply because they do not believe the same. Yet we carry worlds within us as human beings and these worlds are precious to the One who speaks worlds into existence. We judge but have you sat down at one table and learned to know that beautiful one? Have you taken time out to dig deep into their soul past the outter appearance?

Religion can make us stiff-necked and bitter. It can make us divide ourselves from others and catergorize ourselves onto levels to other human beings. I am sorry, if you are reading this and I have led you into any form of religion and not into relationship. I am sorry, if you have experienced religion through what people showed and taught you about Jesus, and not relationship with Jesus.

Let's lose our religion. Let's get to really know Jesus. We will start to see that He is the highest form of freedom, something that religion cannot give you.

Lots of love, Ro.

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